(by Tina Nicole)
(by Tina Nicole)
cat you are messing up my selfie.
Blink // The Doctor, the Widow, and the Wardrobe
“OMG and then they got married and had babies it’s so romantic!”
It’s fucking creepy.
Why, you ask?
- Both men were strangers.
- Both women were alone.
- Both women were alone in places where nobody else was around (Madge was walking in the woods, for goodness sake).
- Both women expressed their discomfort and yet both men kept on following them.
- Reg practically forced Madge to marry him — you can say it was just a joke, but still. No.
And no, it’s NEVER okay for men to just follow women around like that even if they know each other. I was surprised Kathy and Madge didn’t run screaming or kick them in the balls or something.
Neither of them were physically threatened, neither of them sought help (because neither of them felt they needed it/were in danger), and Madge is remembering this fondly. It’s a happy memory for her. Stop shitting all over it.
Note that they were strangers and we (as well as Kathy and Madge) didn’t know Ben and Reg’s intention. Yes, they didn’t threaten them physically but it doesn’t mean that what they did is okay. Even if they turned out to be good guys. Even if Madge remembered that particular memory fondly.
This is a TV show with a very wide audience and those scenes were really pushing it between the yes / no area of consent. Imagine kids watching it. Kids who, after watching both episodes, think that strange men following women around is normal occurrence. Boys will think that they can do whatever they want while girls are expected to accept that.
And I’m very much not okay with that.
But there’s a difference between following someone with malicious intent, and following someone like these guys did. Both women were laughing. Both women were having conversations. This is ultimately not an example of what you’re talking about. I understand and agree with most of what you’re saying, just not in this case. Also, if you notice, neither of them said “No, do not follow me.” or even gave a clue that they didn’t want their company, Madge actually did the opposite. So if anything, this is showing kids and people in general that its okay to engage someone like this as long as they want you to.
And also, to the impressionable kids you’re talking about, I’m 100% certain they have parents. And I’m sure that they will guide them and tell them what’s right and wrong. And if not, I don’t think a couple of episodes of Doctor Who, of all things, are going to lead to them doing terrible things in the future.
Okay, so they didn’t have any malicious intent. But so do men who “compliment” women on the streets. No, they don’t mean any harm; they just want to compliment women on their beauty, etc. And we are really close to talking about street harassment here.
Yes, they didn’t say “No, do not follow me.” But we can clearly see from Kathy’s body language that she very much felt uncomfortable being followed. She didn’t laugh. As for Madge, the line “He said he’d keep on following me till I married him!” implied that she asked Reg if he were to keep following her (because she, like Kathy, felt uncomfortable). People can say, maybe she liked that. She liked Reg. We saw the clip where Madge was smiling. Still doesn’t justify the fact that Reg was a stranger to her. This has become all the more problematic with the “no-means-yes” stigma attached to women. And as someone pointed out, how men need to be rewarded for their persistence*.
About kids, let’s just hope they don’t do those terrible things. I also have to add that this doesn’t apply to kids only, but for everyone.
That’s fine. Lets not meet any new people because everyone in the world is a stranger to us and being approached by strangers makes us uncomfortable because they all mean to attack and
I have nothing left to say. Congratulations. People are inherently bad and everyone in every situation, especially on TV, are in danger, especially women. It’s a scary world you live in.
I say we just stop here and accept that we have different points of view.
No it’s not okay to say “lol difference of opinion.”
THIS IS ABOUT CONSENT AS WELL AS MALE ENTITLEMENT TO WOMEN’S BODIES AND TIME.
It is of the utmost importance that people understand what is shown above is NOT okay. Yes, things turned out okay, but in real life, god only knows what would happen.
I’m tired of assholes acting like things AREN’T fucking dangerous for women.
Speaking from personal experience: this is not the kind of situation where you easily say stop following me to someone, even after your answer to his question if he could see you again was decisive no. You have no idea how the man who’s following you like this is going to react. Instinct tells you it’s probably safer to keep a polite conversation going than to outright reject his attentions because even in the middle of a crowded city this situation is fucking scary. Let me repeat that. Even when walking through the center of a big city like Amsterdam, surrounded by a lot of other people, it doesn’t feel safe to just say, “No, do not follow me.” I had to get on public transportation and I was planning to tell the tram conductor that this guy had come from the opposite direction, so he clearly wasn’t going to my destination, and that I had been followed for the past 15 minutes, that it was late and dark, that I had to get off at a very quiet (read: I was usually the only one) stop, and that I felt very unsafe. The fact that it wasn’t outrageous for me to think that he’d follow me on the tram, or to still think that he’d have followed me home if I’d lived within walking distance, even after I had explicitly told him I had no interest in seeing him again, makes what Moffat does here not okay. It’s not okay for a popular show to present this situation as “romantic”. It’s something Real People in the Real World have to deal with, and it’s fucking scary, not romantic.
Striking up a conversation with a stranger is totally fine, showing interest in that stranger is okay too, depending on how you approach them, but following them and harassing them after they’ve declined your avances is not okay. And based on this gifset (I’ve only seen this Christmas episode when it came out), Madge did reject him at first, otherwise he’d have no reason to say he’d follow her until she married him.
Otter Wants Only the Top of Her Head to Get Wet
Corgi Tricks [x]
get out of there cat. you are not the breakfast of champions.
you’ve got a pretty obvious tell.
“ So, we’ve managed to eliminate all enemy ships, no one on board was injured, and the successful rescue of the Kobayashi Maru crew is under way. Anything else? ”
Tom Hiddleston attends the Jameson Empire Awards 2013 at The Grosvenor House Hotel on March 24, 2013 in London, England [HQ]
get off of there cat. those cat gifs aren’t gonna reblog themselves.